This is another becoming willing step—like before Step One, like Step Two, like Step Six. I become willing to make amends to those I have harmed. Sometimes this is easy—it takes a few seconds for me to think, “Oh, yes, I owe this person an amend.”
Like Step Four, I think people get freaked out and hung up on the following step. Step Nine was one that I shook my head in horror when I first read it on the wall. I am NOT doing that. So the becoming willing is important in this lifetime education without a graduation. I recall one of my sponsors telling me to take my list from Step Four of those I had harmed, and make it into several. One list is for those I feel I can do soon, within a week or month or so. The next list is those I am afraid to make—there are issues that have to be first digested, so this second list is for those I may find very difficult and may have to put off for a year or so. The third list is for people I swear to myself I will never speak to ever again as long as I live and I will never make amends to them.
The point is – over time we find people moving from list two to list one, and people from list three to list two. After all, we are not perfect, but we do want to be free, so we do this kind of stuff as we live our lives and we don’t drink no matter what.